i surprised myself for ever thinking of posting on this blog again. but it think i will better write down in black and white in case i have forgotten again, given my limited intelligence.
determination. i must not lose my determination. its been really really long since i have been determined about doing something. this time i think i am about to break my limit of my determination because i must change my forgetfulness within one month (or more?) i am a person who procrastinates so much that it can be compared to the amount of rice i've eaten, honestly speaking i still not sure if i am able to do that within a month.
forgetfulness. i must not forget to call you everytime i get home. i must not forget to call you when i am out doing something else. i must not forget the important stuffs you had said (like what are the plans you have for the next blah-day). i must not forget to be determined to change my forgetfulness. (so if i may request, dont get angry if i ask you one more time - to confirm again)
and, i must not forget you have the right to be angry with me and that you might forget and your old habits acts up again (its not i am underestimating you, i definitely have faith in you that you will try your very very very best in changing), i will still forgive you, as long as its not way overboard. humans are not meant to be perfect every single time, isnt it? this i have understood it well.
yes, i am trying very hard to psycho myself. although part of me didnt want to do it, i will just do it anyway. because this will benefit me in the long run. hopefully this can reduce my risk of getting Alzheimer's disease at a young age. i dont know if my brain can take this kind of stress, but im afraid one day it might get screwed up and go crazy (ok im bullshitting a little).
but, i really hope you can understand if i ever fail sometimes. like i said, i will bear with the little discrepancies that you might show after one week, i hope you will do the same to me too.
but nevertheless, i will still love you and cherish you. we work hard together for this relationship, ok?
missy blogged @ |12:54 AM|
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*Sunday, December 21, 2008
ding dong ding dong! finally willing to touch my blog once again. nobody is interested in reading my blog anyway. this blog has been stopped its traffic of visitors since probably the day i started. hence the name of my blog. see, even the name of my blog has its significance. =)
the reason why i had not been blogging diligently because i find no meaning in blogging about my everyday life. i don't want my blog to sound like any other blogs out there. maybe their ways of putting words together is not the same, but the message brought across are still the same.
i only blog when there is really something bothering me and i really need to get it out. or just some random thoughts of mine about life. i now treat my blog as some kind of emotional therapy and a canister to contain my collection of thoughts.
btw, Christmas is near. have a merry X'mas and a happy new year. =)
missy blogged @ |6:27 PM|
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*Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Most of you had probably already known that i have already with another guy. Some of you may think its too sudden and maybe i might have made the wrong decision. Or even some of you might say some things unpleasant about me, i don't know. No, i do not treat boyfriends as clothes which are to be changed frequently. If its that so, i would have broken up with my ex long ago and go for another guy. Its just that even though i knew we are cant stay together for long but i insisted that we can last and be happy together in the future. It was my stubborness to hold on and i even escaped from all the problems coming on our way. But to be honest, i didnt really feel real love before. I say this just in case some of you might get the wrong idea about me.
But whatever you all may think, i wont regret the decision i had made. I know deep in my heart that my boyfriend is the one who is really true to me. He will be the one who is constantly by my side, ready to hold on to me whenever i fall. People may think im foolish to be so sure that he is really the one for me after i know him for mere 5 days. But whatever people say, it still doesnt affect me. I made such a decision because i really think its the right thing to do before i tastes even more regrets.
I think that is all i have to say for now. Until the next time.
missy blogged @ |1:14 AM|
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*Thursday, October 02, 2008
so many things had happened. so much thats its overwhelming. all these began when i first joined VentureEra. i had fights and quarrels with my mom and even my sister, who had never scolded me a word in my entire life, reprimanded me for being so naive and insensible. they asked me to wake up to the reality. it is not at all that easy to succeed. you will have to make a lot of sacrifices of those people and things you treasure in order to get the success you want. it is definitely a really big risk to take. it is really natural for mothers and close ones to object because they cared, and they did not want me to fall too hard.
during my 5 days at VentureEra, i had definitely learnt a lot of valuable things that is impossible for you to realise in an ordinary and mundane life. and also things about success and inspirations in life that cant be learnt in any school textbooks. i had learnt that success not as hard as you think, as long as you keep picking yourself up and try again. sounds easier than doing it, but it is achievable with a strong mind.
i had both cried and had joy during my short 5 days. although i had yet to break my own limit in VentureEra, i did not regret joining it. but it was quite a pity that i will not be able to join my lovely friends at the company who are always there for me. lastly, i would like to thank all my friends over there, andric, boon keat, edward, jonah and junwei for giving me one of the best moments in my life, and those who i really admire and respect, mr dewey ho, mr glenn, mr eric, mr alvin and mr wai jun for inspiring me all the way.
good luck to all my friend in VE!
missy blogged @ |1:35 PM|
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*Saturday, August 30, 2008
studio project is finally over. so much stress and conflicts during the 3 weeks. so much drama during our group work too. shall not elaborate. i am always the one who is being the slackest. i deserve a 3 for all aspects for the peer evaluation. =(
but at least i have learnt a lot from this project. i now realise what it takes to be a good teamplayer. it was so much harder then what i expected before the project.
the presentation is crap. its a good thing that i had'nt threw my stinking heels backwards into their smug faces. the lecturers, particularly that fat pig (who really deserved the title as the "mother pig" more than ms gail) and esther, who were not showing the decent basic respect every presentors deserves. they certainly have a pretty bad sense of humour because they laughed at the slightest thing that tickles them like its the funniest thing in the world. somemore esther even said something about us not giving respect to the presentors in front. is like, hello? who laughed and gave unnecessary comments the loudest during the presentation? who are the ones who are showing even more disrespect to the presentors in front than us? at least we have the courtesy to keep quiet and listen throughout the presentation without making remarks out loud, even though sometimes the presentation gets a little boring. yes, the lecturers have the most "authority" to say or comment anything they like, but that dosen't give them the right to critisize our manners if they can't uphold respect for people themselves. they have certainly forgot the seriousness of this final presentation and they as lecturers should uphold a good example for us to follow. i am sorry if i am not giving respect to that fat pig and esther, but i can't describe how disgusted and disappointed i was at them.
missy blogged @ |8:53 PM|
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*Wednesday, August 13, 2008
whoa. by MIA-ing for several weeks my blog has transformed into Kids Central or something like that. apparently some people out there needs to get a serious life. so what's next? Powerpuff Girls or Pokemon? well, really i dont mind these cartoon characters to come and have a nice visit to my blog. they can be entertaining too.
blogging during the "concentration" time again. seriously i still dont feel the pressure on me yet. not until the very end of the studio project i think.
call me immature. right now all i wanted to do is to stare into the blank space for like forever. why i dont know. i think this is one of those kind of days when my brain just feel like shutting down for a while.
brain dead dead dead dead. im going to be a zombie soon.
ok. i dont know what to type again. thats all for now.
*accidently deleted my old tagboard so i haveto replace with a fresh brand new one.*
missy blogged @ |9:27 AM|
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*Tuesday, August 12, 2008
a random day at a random time of the day blogging a random post. nothing to do during our 'concentration' time in M412. only feel like dozing off after the sumptous lunch at Sakura.
argh. 3 more weeks to paradise. its so damn long. what to do? we still have so many things to do for studio project. its very likely that i cant cope again. to think that we have to overcome yet another tide of schoolwork after the first tide is over. its so tiring. but we have no choice.
ok, thats all for today. dozing off very soon. until the next post.